I can’t ever talk about my feelings to anyone.
I can’t talk about them because I’m afraid of impeding on their happiness.
I can’t talk about them because they’re too sad, and I feel I need to make them feel better.
I can’t talk about them because I’m afraid they would hurt others.
I can’t talk about them because I don’t know who are my friends.
I can’t talk about them because I don’t know who I can trust.
I can’t talk about them because I’m afraid people will use them to attack me.
I can’t talk about them to my significant other because they have trouble understanding.
I can’t talk about them because I’m afraid of what will happen when I let go of them.
I can’t talk about them because I’m afraid they’ll get worse.
I can’t talk about them because it reminds me how pathetic I see myself.
I can’t talk about them because it means I have to admit how alone I feel I am.
I can’t talk about them because I think people are more important than me.
I can’t talk about them because I think everything is more important than what I feel.

And what’s sad is on the rare occasion when I actually do say what needs to be said, no one listens, and then I realize my voice has winded back to the starting line.

Diamonds: Epilogue

Diamonds - Yoko Kanno ft. Ilaria Graziano

And there we have it! It is officially finished, and I couldn’t be anymore relieved. This one was more of an ordeal than Triangles was, that’s for sure. Overall though, I’d say out of the two so far, this one is my favorite. I put a lot of my own emotions that I was feeling at the time into it, and did my best not to let it overpower me while I was writing like I did with Triangles. I also enjoyed writing the story and creating Pestilence, which I absolutely loved doing. Villains are fun to write, I guess. Hahahaha!

I’m very happy with the way the endings came out too. They feel a little dry to me, I guess, but I enjoy the strangeness of the three endings, as well as the overall Epilogue which I did my best to try and wrap everything up for everyone. I bet none of you were expecting that guest OC to make an appearance eh? Here is a posting of all the credits for the OCs I used for the story after these notes, created by some wonderful and amazing friends of mine!

Nick, Nicky, and Barnaby – Nope

Maxine and Amy – Waifu

Evelyn – RinnySega

Also, I’d like to thank all my readers and anybody who gave me the inspiration to keep going on. I even want to thank the people who gave me the negative and toxic feelings I had through out this too, because without them, I may not have created some of the drama or high octane action sequences within the story. Take a negative and turn it into a positive! Writing is a wonderful way to vent and create scenes. In the end, you find yourself smiling and proud of your own work. But I digress…

From the bottom of my heart – to all my reviewers, readers, watchers, friends, and all those who kept pushing me to do this – THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! Thank you so much for reading and for being there from beginning to end! THANK YOU ALL SO VERY MUCH!

*hugs*

So Until Next Fic…

Adieu…

agentlowkey:

Well, I thought it was funny. 

You’re not the only one dude.  I think it’s pretty funny.

Welp, I just finished proofing and editting the very last Diamonds submission.  I hope you all are ready for tonight.  I am both relieved and saddened.

I don’t have a problem with it.  It must be popular amongst some people if there are that many reviews, and while I am slightly saddened about getting review dethroned, I’m not upset.  I’m just happy that people read my work and enjoy it.  Hell, I’m happy they read anyone’s work, to be honest.  So kudos to that story, and I wish them all the luck in the future.  :)  Thanks for the heads up though, Anon.  I wasn’t aware of the amount of reviews it had.  Congrats to them!

Stag Party
GABBERSTAG - Renard ft. Futret (FREE DOWNLOAD)

gourmetgaming:

Shadow of Memories/Shadow of Destiny: Chocolate Sample

To celebrate of a whole year of Gourmet Gaming this week, I thought I’d feature a recipe from my favourite game, Shadow of Memories.

You can grab this easily missed ‘Chocolate Sample’ in chapter 3 from Marie’s Bakery during 2001, but it isn’t an essential item to Eike Kusch’s ultimate survival. As the description hints, you can give it to any female character in the game and sweeten her mood. I personally like to give it to Margarette who, living in 1580, has never tasted chocolate before, and seems incredibly delighted by it. I can’t really imagine what it must be like to taste chocolate for the first time… Almost like telling a girl who has a crush on you that she might be your ancestor; devastating but delicious. Set in the fictional German town of “Lebensbaum”, I thought the oft mistaken for actually being German, classic ‘German chocolate cake’, would be a good place to draw inspiration for this decadent, yet currently unnamed, chocolate sample.

This recipe makes 12-15 Chocolate Samples.

What you will need: Yellow cupcake cases, a baking tray, 3 large bowls, 1 small bowl, a small pot, a sieve, an icing bag/syringe and a whisk.

For the Chocolate Samples:

60g / ½ Cup High Quality Dark Chocolate

60ml / ¼ Cup Fresh Hot Coffee/Water

115g / 1 Cup Unsalted Butter

140g / ¾ Cup Granulated Sugar

2 Large Eggs (Separated) (Room Temperature)

½ Teaspoon Vanilla Extract

110g / 1 Cup Plain Flour

1 Tablespoon Cocoa Powder

½ Teaspoon Bicarbonate Soda/Baking Soda

Pinch of Salt

125ml / ½ Cup Whole Milk

For the Ganache:

85g / ¾ Cup High Quality Chocolate

65ml / ¼ Cup Double/Heavy Cream

For the Frosting:

90g / ¾ Cup Butter

280g / 2¾ Cup Icing/Confectioners Sugar

40g /⅓ Cup Cocoa Powder

4 Tablespoons Whole Milk

For the Garnish:

30g / ¼ Cup Sweetened Desiccated Coconut

30g / ¼ Cup Pecans (Chopped)

Preparing the Chocolate Sample:

1. Preheat the oven to 180C/350F. Place the cupcake cases on a baking tray and set aside.
2. In a large mixing bowl beat the sugar and butter together until pale. Add the 2 egg yolks and the vanilla and beat for another minute.
3. In a separate bowl, pour the hot coffee/water over the chocolate and stir until melted. Pour the melted chocolate into the large bowl over the butter, sugar and eggs and mix well.
4. Gradually sieve in the flour, cocoa powder, baking soda and salt, stirring gently. Finally, add the milk and mix gently once again.
5. In a clean, dry bowl, whisk up the two left over egg whites until puffy. You should be able to hold the bowl over your head and the egg whites wont fall out! Fold the egg whites into the cake batter a spoon at a time, being careful not to knock any of the air out.
6. Divide the mixture between the cupcake casing, filling each 2/3 full. Place the tray in the middle of the oven and bake for 20-25 minutes.
7. Once firm, but springy, remove the cupcakes from the oven to cool completely.

Making the Frosting:

1. In a large bowl add the butter and beat it until it’s pale. Gradually sieve in the icing sugar and cocoa powder, beating vigorously and adding a tablespoon of milk in between.
2. Once well combined and fluffy, place in the fridge for later.

Preparing the Garnish:

1. In a clean, dry pan, add the sweetened desiccated coconut and chopped pecans. Toast them gently on a medium high heat until just turning golden, then remove and set aside.

Making the Chocolate Ganache:

1. Chop the chocolate up finely and place in a large bowl. Meanwhile, in a pot, bring the cream to the boiling point on a medium heat.
2. Once bubbling, pour the hot cream over the chocolate and mix well until melted and combined. Set the mixture aside to cool to room temperature.

Making the Chocolate Samples:

1. Spoon a little of the chocolate ganache on top of each cupcake. Make sure it covers the entire cupcake and creates a smooth, even surface. You can place the cupcakes in the fridge to help them set.
2. Once the ganache is firm, fill your icing bag/syringe with the chocolate frosting and pipe a medium swirl from the centre. Sprinkle over the toasted coconut and pecan, then top with a whole pecan. Give them away as free samples, or eat them all yourself. Like me.

Got cake. Ate cake. Now require one digipad to go back in time to when I still had cake so I can eat it all over again. If that was my purgatory, things wouldn’t be so bad, like some kind of chocolate Sisyphus. People who say things are “too sweet” or “too rich” or “too chocolately” don’t know what they’re talking about. There’s no such thing as any of the above, but if there were, it might apply to these incredible samples. I’ve yet to eat any chocolate cupcake quite like these, or play another game quite Shadow of Memories.

Like this? You might also enjoy the EarthBound – Peanut Cheese Bars.

good-enough-for-a-poke:

I do this every night with your son.